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December 28, 2012
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DELICATESSEN strip by smeagolisme DELICATESSEN strip by smeagolisme
After five hundred years eating naught but fish, cave creatures and orcs, one has to learn and make the feast enjoyable...as you see.
Too bad there isn't any supermarket nearby to go and get some flasks of worcestershire sauce...that would be nice...and some ketchup and mustard for orc sandwiches...yummy.
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:icondeathlydollies13:
Deathlydollies13 Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
XD Your comics are so hilarious!

Yes, Smeagol, you know that!
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Professional General Artist
Heeheehee thanksess preciousss! :iconsmeagolsmilingplz:
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:icondeathlydollies13:
Deathlydollies13 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcomeeeee!
Reply
:iconkayanne21:
kayanne21 Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Everything tastes great with worcestershire  sauce.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Professional General Artist
YUP! :chew:
Especially orc!
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:iconfinnickandannie14:
Finnickandannie14 Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2013   General Artist
hee hee! love my uncle's expression! :D
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh thanks a lot nephew!Stare Roll Eyes :| (Blank Stare) 
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:iconfinnickandannie14:
Finnickandannie14 Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013   General Artist
Sweating a little...
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Haha don't worry I like my face too
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2013  Professional General Artist
He didn'tss know what to ssay preciouss...I thinks it wass becausssse he didn't get to try the orcsess! :iconsmeagolsmileplz:
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:iconfinnickandannie14:
Finnickandannie14 Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013   General Artist
heh. i never tried orc. is it better than fish?
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Professional General Artist
Hm...sssorta...hard to chew on, and...bitter-ish...but...ssstill, more meat than fisssh, and if you getsss ussed to it or getss some sspices to puts them on...not nassty at all!
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:iconsketchevrywir:
Sketchevrywir Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013
You got me wondreing what would happen if Gollum discovered they joy of ketchup.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2013  Professional General Artist
Soon small orcs from Goblin town would've became an endangered species!
XD
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hahaha! :D
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Professional General Artist
And perhaps nice with mustard also...
:chew:
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Uh sure?
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Professional General Artist
PASS THE MUSSTARD THEN! :)
Reply
:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Okay okay!
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:iconpurestrongpoem:
Purestrongpoem Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I remember watching the part when Smeagol attack the orc and drag it with my parents at the theaters.
My parents: he is such an idiot for attacking the orc for no reason and drop the ring.
Me: No, he attack the orc to eat it.
My parents: I thought he only eat sushi.
Me: He also eat orcs too.
My parents: ...
My parents: So why is he so skinny?
Reply
:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013  Professional General Artist
:rofl:
Good question...erm...low fat orcsess preciousss? O.Ou
We really doessn't know!
Sushi's plenty good, though
:iconsmeagolsmileplz::heart:
And alot easier to get!!!
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Maybe starving and eating small proteins.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Professional General Artist
That'sss why!...:iconsmeagolsmileplz:
Needsed more fat!
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yep :D
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Professional General Artist
:chew:
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:D 3 cheers 4 Smeagol
Hip hip. Hooray
Hip hip. Hooray
Hip hip. Hooray
Reply
:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Professional General Artist
:iconsmeagolsjoyplz:*victory dance...no dying this time*
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(1 Reply)
:iconpurestrongpoem:
Purestrongpoem Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
True.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Professional General Artist
AND a lot cleaner...Surely. ¬.¬u
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:iconpurestrongpoem:
Purestrongpoem Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Lol, true.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2013  Professional General Artist
U.Uu
Reply
:iconpurestrongpoem:
Purestrongpoem Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:)
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:icontarpalsfan:
tarpalsfan Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2013
;) Did that Orc squeek and squeek when Gollum bashed it's skull in? Did he save any room for Halfling dessert?
That second panel is priceless! :clap: from tarp

p.s. I know you didn't like The Hobbit movie, but it inspired me to read my old book again...the Riddles in the Dark still gets me...Gollum wondering if Bilbo was Scrumtious and sweet!
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Professional General Artist
Heehee yes he did, preciousss...but desspite what the movie showed, we doess in fact preffer to use our sstrong handsess and chokes it...or our teeth...we sharpens it for ssome reason, doesn't we my preciousss? :iconstinkeyesmeagolplz: Hey! there'sss alwayss room for dessert!...Remember we was once ssome kind of a hobbit, preciousss! :iconsmeagolsmileplz: Hahaha did you like it?...thanks! Oh, I didn't hate it...it's just...I still don't adapt well to the changes they made there...but soon I will settle down...it is a good movie...I just like the book better!
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:icontarpalsfan:
tarpalsfan Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
That young Goblin "Squeeked and Squeeed" in the book too...shudder.
.
Smeagol, dear, you need a mint! (those teeth were scary-I bet they were scarier in the 3D!)
.
Soft and sweet. Too cute to eat. Unless your craving a cupcake---(I said twinky at first, but that was so wrong!)
.
They were not very faithful to the book were they? I did say I took a big dose of open mindedness when I saw The Hobbit, right? It was fun, I got to see some of my all time favorites again. And I don't mind fussing about the stuff that was changed, or not in the book. It just fuels my old obsession!
Oh, which do I prefer? The book or the movie...The Book! The movie doesn't come close to equalling the book. The book is gold...the movie...tin foil!
:hug: from tarp
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Professional General Artist
Heehee...they tendss to do sso when you grabs them and biteses them right in the...ahem...we doessn't want to dissgust Tarp off, doessn't we preciousss? OH NO!...
.
Oh yess...dentistsess are too expenssive for poor poor Sssméagol :iconsmeagoltearssplz:
We wantss dental plan preciousss!
.
OOOOOO, TWINKIESESSS!...O.O
Cupcakesess would be fine as well, preciousss!...What?...We loves chocolate!...Tolkien simply didn't sstate sso becaussse that wass not a sscary detail!...:iconsmeagolblushingplz:
.
Yes that's it!...It was a good movie, indeed...but it went pretty far for me, from the books, in some moments...very far...U.U
I liked it the same...but...I'M IN LOVE WITH THE BOOK!!!
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'll pay for you for dental care
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2013  Professional General Artist
WOULDSSS YOU??? Thanksess!
Here: It's a hard work to do there!
:iconsmeagolbareteethplz:
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:icon15sjens:
15sjens Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Haha
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:icontarpalsfan:
tarpalsfan Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
Chocolate halflings? Chocolate Goblins? Sounds like something from a Harry Potter movie! :lmao:
.
I love the books. I always go book over movie. A movie can't match nor beat what we see in our minds eye.
.
Rascal got ahold of my The Fellowship of the Ring book. Cat was reading it, when our dog grabbed it ot of her hands. He is a mini-dashund and full of piss and vinegar. She got the book, but he nicked the cover. I am not pleased that he got ahold of my book. :no: A mini wiener dog.
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Professional General Artist
OOOOOO CHOCOLATE HALFLINGSSS AND GOBLINSESSS??? :iconwateryeyesmeagolplz::heart:
YUMMY!!!!...We hadn't thoughts of it preciousss!...hm...we shoulds get ssome melting machine and melt chocolatesess on it...and then give a chocolate bath to Bagginsess and goblinsess!!!..AND HAVES THEM FOR SSSUPPER!!! *snores and chokes on the emotion*...sssuch a GOOD IDEA...
.
Oh yes, indeed!...Books are ALWAYS BETTER, PRECIOUS!...You can bet!
Our mind's eye has no technical limitations...it never had, even back then when technology wasn't enough as to take them to movie images!...
Oh and NOW I gotta tell you this!...
The Sméagol in my drawings looks like he does since more or less
22 years!...In my head he always looked like that. The funny thing is I had seen drawings depicting him very different from that which were supposed to influence my view on the character(and the movie froggy...and the pink and fat or green or black mummy like from many authors)...but inside my head he did look like in my drawings ... he still does now!.
The funny thing is, in the Jackson movie he ended up looking quite much like the one I always imagined!...Only mine has green eyes (or grey), a rounder facial structure, despite his thinness- and I always "saw" him very clever and cunning.
.
Please don't strangle the dog!!!...
I imagine you would wanna do it now...-I would too, believe me- but hold yourself back, blue woman!!!...Take a deep breath and try to pretend covers are not important to books!!!...U.U
Oh Rascal, what've you done...
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:icontarpalsfan:
tarpalsfan Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
LOL!
Rascal is naughty. But I love him to much to strangle him..though at times he tempts me! Blue Woman? Abes the blue one-not I! :lol:
.
Well, the Smeagol you draw makes sense, after all, he is a Halfling, or something close to one. I do believe that Smeagol/Gollums eyes were supposed to be green. Fat? How could poor Smeagol be fat? He lives in a cave, and lives on fish, or the unlucky goblin that wanders into Gollums reach. I think this version the best. The amphibious frog like Gollum is fun, and I like it alot. But he doesn't really make alot of sense.
.
That;s really cool that you have always 'seen' Smeagol the way you do. Pretty awesome!
.
I have to agree with you. A movie can't have every wonderful detail that a book does. Did you ever read the book version of Star Wars,Salems Lot, or The Shining? Special effects can add to a movie...but those special effects pale in comparison to what our minds conjure when we read a book.
.
I was yucky feeling last night and this morning. Even chocolate doesn't sound terribly appetizing right now. Esp. not chocolate covered Goblin. :( Nor candy dipped Bilbo. However, those chocolate cupcakes...I bet Bilbo could cook you up some of those! Even sweeter than a Hobbit that missed to many second breakfast! :)
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2013  Professional General Artist
Oh yes, that's how they are...sometimes you wanna squeeze them...but they stare and..well STARE THAT WAY at you and then...you end up rubbing their bellies...
Well for me you're the Blue woman!...not blue like sadblue...blue like Abe!...you know what I mean...I never saw yer face yet! :slow:
So when I think of you...cough...you have Abe's face...nomatter how weird it might sound!
.
Yes we does preciousss :iconsmeagolsmileplz::heart:
I always saw him as a wasted starved child...wretched by time yet never growing up...I guess I took that from Tolkien's letters when he explains the "growth stop" which the ringbearers suffered. I always saw him as ald without being old...In a vampire-like way. A ruined child with an elder's experience...YEAH, THAT.
His eyes were green in the book...so...couldn't help it. ^.^
And yeah, how could he get fat with such a diet and a living???Some Illustrators were thinking in some other thing when they designed him. Seriously. I saw one once which was very fat and pink...and with a walruses' tusks...O.Ou
All that said, the froglike one is kinda cute, and made me laugh alot!!!
Plus, your drawing of him made me grow to like him even more :heart:
.
Awesome:perhaps...Weird:YES!!!...I can't even describe you my face when I first saw him on screen during The Two Towers...I nearly died...seriously I wasn't breathing. The friends which came and watch it with me were like "are you choking on the popcorn?" and I just gasped very low "That's...exactly...it's like somebody ripped that image off my imagination..." and then another of my friends cut me by screaming "OI LAVINIA, GOLLUM'S FACE LOOKS JUST LIKE YOURS!!!"... O.Ou
.
Hm...star wars: nope...Salem's lot, a long time ago...and it was far better than the movie...The shining :no (how could I???)...But other King's stuff yes...and movies tend not to make his books justice, for example...and well...Lewis Carrol's ALICE...Nobody ever got that one right...Burton's one I like it...but it's another thing.
So yes...effects might be wonderful...but our minds surpass them easily if we're creative.
.
Hmmm:iconstinkeyesmeagolplz:
So perhapsess it iss better if I gets him to sstay and cook ssome of those preciousss...iss Kath better now, my preciousss?...wouldss she have ssome cupcakesess if we gets the Bagginsess to cook? :innocent:
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(1 Reply)
:iconcursedfreak:
CursedFreak Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Con la mala higiene que tienen los orcos no me extraña que sepan mal!! (a parte de lo correosa/dura que sea su carne) Al menos Smeagol se baña en el lago subterráneo!! :XD:
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Professional General Artist
Si, ssseñor!...Dessspuéss que anden por allí diciendo que apessto, tessoro!...¿Cómo podría apesstar ssi me passo la mitad de la vida en el agua?... *ahem*...Sssí, los orquitoss sson duros, correososss y algo asquerossosss...pero con algo de salsa, pues vale, tessoro...
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:iconebalance:
Ebalance Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Tastes like chicken, right? Sorry for my terrible joke, but someone had to say it. XD
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:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012  Professional General Artist
Hm...yesss preciousss...chicken... a bitsy dark and stringy...but yess, like chicken!
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:iconebalance:
Ebalance Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
XD
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:iconwindwo1f:
WindWo1f Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Mmmm! Delicious! :D
Reply
:iconsmeagolisme:
smeagolisme Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012  Professional General Artist
Wantsess some?...Here'sss enough for uss both preciousss! :iconsmeagolsmileplz:
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